Day 730 (Ending of 2)

West - Sleeping at Last Laying wide awake. I looked next to me. The vast emptiness. I run my hand over “your” side. Time has worn away the indentations only you could create. It has now been my bed longer than it was ever our bed. I thought back to laying in the bed at … Continue reading Day 730 (Ending of 2)

Day 729

***To actively feel this writing please listen to the music suggested*** Get comfy. Feet planted on the floor or maybe one on top of your favorite body pillow. Grab a blanket. Or sit on your favorite rug in your reading nook. Find the quiet. The peace. Find your space. Whatever that is. No right. No … Continue reading Day 729

Day 728

Mourning Bitches! In the mess of September I went against almost everything I say I stand for. I try to be kind and loving. I want to support to those who feel they have no one in the corner. Widows, non-widows, mental illness, artists, those that need a laugh, fill in the blank _________ Not … Continue reading Day 728

Day 727

It’s like sludge Beginning to fill my lungs I know this feeling I knew it was coming It always returns Loss becomes me   I am not scared Not as I was last year I know you are here I know that in the end I will find only this I can endure this storm … Continue reading Day 727

Day 726

“There's no shadow you won’t light up. Mountain you won’t climb up coming after me” -Reckless Love (Cory Ashbury) I must have been forgiven.... For something... I feel as though I am sitting still in the middle of the rock concert. So surreal to finally step back to see the whole picture. Reprioritizing one area … Continue reading Day 726

Day 725

(The duality of processing trauma) Are you processing grief or processing loss? When a heavy “grief wave” comes is it really just loss? This question was posed to me and I struggled to find a response. Grief has been everything. All I've known for years now. What if I am the one keeping myself sick? … Continue reading Day 725

Day 703

"Good God, what have I done? Gone and left the only one That ever really, truly, deeply loved me Honestly, how stupid could I be? My poor heart your demons want You turned dark, picked out a gun In the incapable hands of your master Downworth spiral, bound for disaster" "You are not well.” My … Continue reading Day 703